Monday, July 27, 2009

Oh My Fricking Gosh! (In A Freakishly Awesome Way :D)

*note: all single letter names in this post are secret. plus they are names that tend to make me giggle like crazy*

today, was, as much as i hated parts of it, was AWESOME! like, awesome, in all caps, all bold, and extralarge...awesome like this: AWESOME! <- like that. :)

here's what happened. day started off boring...french class, koshy going insane with early morning bad jokes (i still don;t know how thakur did yoga and i don't care!!) then, i went to my aunt's place, collected my new purple wallet, which is oh so hot!!!, my twilight keyring [:D], twilight soundtrack CD [:D :D], and twilight poster [:D :D :D]. finally i went to college, finished the first lecture, went to the library where we bugged shrishti beyond recognition, then went to attend the 4th lecture. now here's where my day decided to go awesome. i get out, with koshy and the others, and while we're walking to the canteen, and all of a sudden, out of god alone knows where, i meet R, school friend, and long, long-time crush! and then i had the freakiest smile on my face! we both left our groups and headed to each other...gosh he is still so SO sweet! we exchanged numbers (i managed that rather slyly for myself, i might add ;D), and then just walked till his stop and talked. he's in the college bang next to mine, which means there is a fairly darned good chance that we meet again, and again...i hope.

and now is the second large awesome! i log on to facebook after a shower...the usual. notifications, requests, etc. ...so i check out my requests, and i see a request from K, another crush, who i met while on a trip to Egypt, at the age of 12. i had this massive crush on him for a while, but then we lost touch. we chatted some time ago now, and it was soo weird! we both are older, and we're pretty cool with talking to each other! and he tells me i'm still the same, haven't changed a bit! :D

i know all this sounds like totally lame, but for me, this just brings back the best of memories and a goofy feeling inside me...hmmm....:/

that's all with the updates! ciao!

x

Monday, July 20, 2009

I'm sorry. Back to friends...yay! Crush matter. Voldy oh so moldy!:D. EVIL!!!

>> i'm sorry for just not talking to you and saying those things about you. i was a total bitch to you. i guess i felt like their friendship meant more to me than yours. you are important. period. :)

>> do i still like you? or don't i? it's hard to decide. it was funny after how we exchanged, like, 3 words in the 2-3 weeks you've been here, i still look and stare...thinking matter.

>> saw Harry Potter 6 AGAIN. a promise made month ago, as i realized, could be fatal if broken. either way, i figured something out while i spoiled each scene for my friends...Voldemort had, like, a shit load of free time on his hands to rip his soul into 7, THEN hide them in these freakishly maddening places...

>> you're glares are a sight for sore eyes now. dare to come talk to me, and you're gonna hear the biggest speech about how you made me feel disgusting about myself, and how all you made me do is cry. i guess i grew up and moved on for better crap.

no more news...Rupert love still on! i bugged dad too, who's in London, and told him to shop for H.P nick knacks...his reply, aren't you too old for that now? my reply, uh...NO!?!?! =D

life. love. joy. hope.

x

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Sheesh!

starting off, Harry Potter was disappointing. i've been using that word a lot since yesterday, every time someone asked me how the movie was...either way, the only thing keeping me up during the second half was my cheese pop corn. first half was AMAZING!!! minus the ron lavender kiss (no comment, unless you want me to jump off my seat and shred the screen into pieces)...also, did Dumbledore bury himself in his own coffin without a funeral? and does the Elder Wand hold no significance AT ALL???

you still hold my interest. for one thing, i know you're a reader and maybe a writer, since you showed an incredible amount of interest at the fact that i'm a mini journalist now. your smile is...Oh.My.Gosh. it's like the perfect lopsided one. now if only you'd smile back when i make a fool of myself and smile at you. i did that twice yesterday, while you held my gaze, and you just turned away. i was soooo embarassed. though now i'm confused...did you see it or not? still likin' ya...

i hate this confusion. Rupert, come to India and sweep me off my feet. things will be a LOT easier then! (again, i soooo wish.)

x

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

The New (capital) G.

i don't know how i'm going to get enough courage to come and talk to you. i guess i'm going to be using the "ask if you need any help" line on you. i barely even know you and yet, i'm going bonkers!!

well, i guess that was yesterday's news. i know she likes you too, and at first it was painful to deal with, but now, i'm cool with it. and yeah, everyone can see you've got a thing for the other one, which again, doesn't bother me! i'm surprised and happy with myself with that fact.

i still like you, and i still want to talk to you, but i'm not dying or going crazy to do so. i still like you, yes. just not in the great catastrophic proportions that i used to...if that made sense.

let's see what happens now! i'm ready for some excitement! :D

x

Monday, July 13, 2009

Unlucky Lucky Mascot With An Upcoming Free Haircut. And For The Love Of True Friends.

it's a little crazy, and weird. i mean, to me it is. weird, i mean. ok, i'm going to stop ranting, since that is basically all i do. either way, i'm going to do this point wise, so i have my shit sorted on this post! :D

>> the guy i was not so secretly in love with last year and who i hate now, seems to give an amazing day every time we cross paths in college. he's the unlucky lucky mascot. he's a total jackass, and now he stares at me every time he walks past me, but i turn the other way and talk to my friend like i care a damn. i feel like such a bitch when i do that, but it s the most amazing feeling in the world! teehee! :P

>> i'm going to get a free haircut next month! at one of the posh hair salons! they're going to be done by aspiring hair stylists, so basically we're going to be the lab rats, but i don't care...it's free!! i asked mom if i could get streaks done, and she said, as long as it's all free, go bald and i don't care! which, in a good way, means, go wild!

>> i feel like i bad that i didn't trust one of my best friends day before yesterday. i thought i couldn't, only because i felt she was overly friendly with them then she claims to be (if you're reading this and it doesn' make sense to you, i understand. even i don't get it). but i totally got over that shit. i feel so silly for having thought that. she's like a sister to me! <3>> me and koshy had a blast yesterday... we were outside the salon, it was raining, and we were trying to get a ride home. we waited for like half and hour, and my tummy got upset, she was trying to make me laugh, we were goofing around...it was a BLAST!!! i love it when we both go crazy and care a shit... :)

>> my love for Rupert has just upped by a gazillion notches... *sigh*. he's like, surprisingly, the only guy i've been soo frigging screechy about! i'm not a freak, just another fan who calls herself Mrs. Rupert Grint! see? i have a picture for proof :P


=D

i'm done babbling. signing off, still loving my life right now, and all the people in it.

x

Sunday, July 12, 2009

...And Then Lavender Kissed Ron.

argh! i need to vent so very desperately about this, since my mother wouldn't be very pleased about the fact that i dream of myself in the place of Jessie Cave while she snogs Rupert in the latest Harry Potter movie. despite the fact that i'm a humongously maniacal Harry Potter fan, which she is only too well aware of, she has laughed over my undeniable love for Rupert, saying: "well, see, it's never happening, so i have nothing to worry about". and this was when i was 13...can you believe it? 13? and at that age, i'd been in love with Rupert for precisely 2 years. either way, back to reason for venty feeling (that makes no sense. fuck it. just read on), they showed the making of Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince a few minutes ago on HBO. and they repeated the Ron-Lavender kiss too many times for my comfort. i'm like this big ball of inexplicable grumpiness at the moment!


i tried uploading more pictures, however, blogger isn't helping by error-ing me. this is the best i could do. *still fuming*

this is my facebook status, just to let you know: "anger flows from within at the fact that Jessie Cave gets to snog Rupert Grint's face out. and oh yeah, Angela May has the best job in the world. *grumpy*"


i had to, i had to post that. like i have to, have to write this. i've hated lavender since the day i read the scene in the book itself. i swear. how unfair can life be??? i'm stuck here in India, got a boring life, in desperate search of the perfect relationship...ok, scratch that last bit, i'm 16. i can't be so desperate for that. or maybe i can be. I DON'T KNOW! either way, Rupert, yet again, if you're reading this, respond. in some way or the other. (i wish.)


thanks for reading if you did! now scamper off. you have better ways to waste time! =D

x

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

???

i don't know if i should change myself or not. certain friends of mine hate me. they think i'm immature because i laugh at the wrong times and i laugh too much, they think i'm cheap because i stick to a low budget when i'm stripped of cash, they think i like eating their leftovers when they waste almost half the stuff, and they think i'm a total narcissistic bitch. they think that my temper will never get me anywhere and my 'take me the way i am' attitude is 'inappropriate'.

i hate it when this happens. such incidents just make me rethink myself, make me depressed, and make the tears just pour out. they think i take advantage of the fact that i've seen enough negativity at a young age and that apparently i need to step up and manage my shit since i'm 16. i don't know what to do. they're two people, one of whom was one of my best friends once upon a time, and now she's changed so much that she no longer stands out. she's just another person in the crowd. and she doesn't even see it when i tried to tell her.

am i a bitch? am i cheap? i know a temper will ever get anyoe anywhere, but i have controlled it. trust me, i have. i'm not as bad as i used to be. i've got into near fistfights in the past! now, anyone says shit about me, i laugh it off. but it's hurting me terribly now. these were people i loved with all my heart. my true friends...well, i guess not so true. still, i feel like i'm in the dark bottomless pit, falling, with no one to be Mr. stretch and lend me a hand and pull me out of misery. i want to get out of here. i really do. i want to leave behind my whole past, and start afresh somewhere else. not running away, just, moving on.

i'm hating myself so much right now. i'm crying, but it seems as though there's no one to see the pain. i hate feeling like this. they really were close to me, and now, they just think i'm plastic. and they won;t even say it to my face, that's the worst. i did enough saying when we'd had a fight. i let my whole heart out. but they just wanna fake around. i feel soo disgusted about myself right now. i want to change, but i can't.

adding to all of that, i feel like i suck at writing, again. as though there's nothing lef in me. just a talentless piece of crap.

i feel sick. help.

Monday, July 6, 2009

OH.MY.GOSH. Please get well soon.

my friend literally woke me up with a text message saying that Rupert Grint (yes, the one i'm married to...the one i'm absolutely positively madly in love with.) has swine flu, or rather, HAD. i was getting ready to go for my french tuition, and i was already late (surprise surprise) when she texted me. i died. i'm not kidding i died. i had tears in my eyes. my hair was not combed and i actually ran out of the house with a pigeon nest for a head of hair. how could he let himself get swine flu?? Rupert Alexander Lloyd Grint, why didn't you wash you hands, or something? i just wish he'd take care...


gosh. that was like the worst scare in my life EVER.


oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh. i think i'm still going to be 'oh-my-gosh-ing' for a while now. it's still hitting me. rupert is like the bestest actor in my head. the most adorable, the sexiest, the funniest, the most talented, and yes, the hottest guy for me. argh! i just wish he'd be way more careful!!!!


x

P.S: rupert, if you come across this blog (HA! i WISH!), i just hope you're okay now. please please PLEASE take care of yourself. i need you onscreen and off screen to make me swoon and be a total girl with my screeches. =D love always. <3

P.S II: here's the link to the BBC report that states that rupert (*screeches*) 'had swine flu' (*sobs*):
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/8134632.stm